Hello...

Name or name of preference: poly_bear Looking for polyfidelity

Where in the world are you: Kansas City, MO

Tell us a little about yourself (interests, hobbies, kinks, etc): We love a lot of things, including camping. I have a very eclectic spiritual belief system that is very important to me and would hope that a future partner would have spiritual beliefs as well. I love reading and writing and art and musicals and GOOD science fiction movies...and sex...and I have a kinky nature that I don't often get to explore. He is into games (boy, is he) and Dr Who and British television and really really bad movies (Sci-fi and otherwise). He is a bit more vanilla than I am sexually, but he is fabulous anyway, if you know what I mean. **G** As for my kinks, if all this interests you, I can tell you what they are...

Tell us a little about what/who you are looking for: I am gay, I have a male gay partner that I am very much in love with and we would be looking for a polyfidelitous relationship with another gay man. We have been exploring slightly opening our relationship at the moment, but I am not sure that is a permanent thing. For me, it is learning to deal with ego issues, jealousy issues, fear issues... And to play with someone that my partner isn't interested in or more specifically, exploring sexual outlets that he doesn't get into... But mostly it is getting over painful baggage. It was scary letting him play the other night alone...but I think it strengthen us immensely. And shit, if we do get another husband, the sex cannot ALWAYS be a three-way! I have to get over those issues! Sometimes the two of them will have sex without me and that HAS to be WAY okay. After all, sometimes it will be just me and my partner or me and the new partner!!!

In other words, we are not perfect, and we are learning... And it is exciting! The world is just FULL of possibilities!

Any other information you want to share: I think one of the main problems with monogamy (something that appealed to me most of my life, but no longer) is that we are culturally conditioned to belief that we will find ONE IMPORTANT person to be our "be all and end all." And that is nearly, if not totally, impossible. No one can be that "everything" and we can't be that for anyone else, although it might seem like that when we are caught up in a new relationship.

For instance, my partner hates musicals and doesn't like to talk about spiritual matters... They are terribly important to me and it is sad to me that I have to look for friends to share these things with. I want to share them with a lover/partner. My lover loves games and Dr Who and I hate them both... It makes him sad because they are terribly important to him and he wants to share them with a lover/partner...

So it would be wonderful, for instance, to find a husband for us both, one who liked musicals and spirituality and games... Then I could share my loves with him and my partner could share his loves with him and we would all still have each other...

Hope this was enough informaton for now...